


Frottage With Sad Robot

by dogtier



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Artificial Intelligence, Frottage, M/M, Robot Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-31
Updated: 2012-01-31
Packaged: 2017-10-30 09:45:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/330379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dogtier/pseuds/dogtier
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Honestly what it says on the package.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Frottage With Sad Robot

**Author's Note:**

> Dedicated to [notdavesprite](http://notdavesprite.tumblr.com/) for being a continuing inspiration in the field of Feelings About Robots. Sorry about making them sad all the time.

The metal was cold under his lips, cold and hard and as unyielding as a wall, which meant it was quite a familiar feeling as Jake mashed his lips against it. The taste was different though, a metallic tang rather than worn down paper and ink. His lips probably weren’t going to end up stained blue this time either, which was a big upgrade in his opinion. The moving he wasn’t so sure about yet. He would get a good thing going with his tongue when suddenly the metal would shift, turning or twisting or doing something that would make Jake slip in his own spit and bang their faces together. 

After doing so once again, he sat back on his heels and rubbed his forehead. 

“Oh, blast it,” he muttered. Brobot tilted his head questioningly. “It’s not you, chap. I’m just so clumsy. This isn’t working at all.” 

Brobot tenderly rubbed Jake’s side, making the boy sigh and relax again. Jake leaned forward, slowly putting his weight on the robot until they were pressed tight together with his face tucked into the space between Brobot's neck and shoulder. Brobot raised one hand to Jake’s back and tapped out Morse code. 

“I-S T-H-I-S O-K-A-Y?” Brobot spelled. Dirk had been a talented thirteen year old, but an oratory system that didn't sound like a screeching, deranged Stephen Hawking with an abnormal Texan twang had been beyond his robotsmithing skills at the time of Brobot's construction. Jake and Brobot made due with other means of communication. 

“Of course, it’s wonderful, jolly wonderful,” Jake said. He wriggled against the robot’s chassis, making his shirt was riding up and allowing the bare skin of his stomach to have direct contact with the cool metal. It felt nice in contrast to the oppressive heat of the island. He could feel the faint buzzing of the robot's internal fans, not quite a heartbeat but certainly close. Jake ran a hand down Brobot’s side, trying to tickled but the surface stayed frustratingly still under his fingers. Brobot had told him that even though he couldn’t feel the way humans did he could still sense the touch and found it pleasant. Sometimes Jake wondered if he just said that to make Jake feel better. 

Brobot pushed on Jake's side in question and the boy consented to being rolled over onto his back with Brobot hovering above him. Brobot was careful, always careful when they weren't actually sparing, and pressed Jake back into the grass. Brobot pushed a leg between Jake's and was startled when he hissed in pain. 

"Let up a moment," Jake said. Brobot jerked away. "No, you're not hurting me, don't worry. Stone under my hip. There we go." 

Jake tossed the rock to the side and tugged Brobot's arms until he returned to his previous position. He preferred it this way. There was a nagging instinct deep inside him to never turn his back to the jungle. With his trusty robot over him he didn't have to worry about that, about exposing your weak spots and being inattentive and mistakes kill in the wild, he felt completely content and safe. It was probably idiotic, there was no safe spot on this island but the thoughts were lost to a haze when Brobot rocked his hips in a lovely downward arc, just firmly enough. 

"Oh," Jake gasped. He hummed and let his eyes slip close. He could here the lapping of waves in the distance if he really concentrated, but mostly he just heard his own panting. Brobot didn't breathe, of course, and his servos were nearly perfectly silent. There was no creak of under oiled joints, no screech of metal against metal, with his eyes closed it was almost like making love to a phantom. 

Jake opened his eyes, blinking at the bright sunlight flickering in from the edges of Brobot's silhouette above him. He felt slightly bad about not doing any of the work, but it was too damn hot and even Brobot's cooling systems could keep heat from building between their bodies. Jake moaned, whined really, turning his head to the side and drawing air deep into his lungs best he could. Brobot balanced on one arm and used the other to tilt Jake's face back so he could press their lips together. Well, press his lip approximations to Jake's real ones in what was a perfectly adequate kiss in Jake's opinion (not that he had many points for comparison, or any points really). Jake wrapped his arms around Brobot's neck, careful not to cut himself on the sharp points of the metal hair spikes (what was Dirk even thinking with those?) and licked Brobot's face. Anyone watching would find it ridiculously unsexy. 

It didn't take long for Jake to come, not spectacularly or world destroyingly, just gently and lovely as everything else, making him shiver and shake until Brobot pulled away from his suddenly oversensitive flesh. 

"That was rather wonderful," Jake said, throwing an arm over his eyes for some shade. "What do you say to a dip in the pond near the waterfall next?" 

Brobot reached out and tapped on Jake's elbow.

"S-O-U-N-D-S P-E-R-F-E-C-T," he said. After a moment, he continued. "L-I-K-E Y-O-U."

"Oh rubbish," Jake said, smacking Brobot on his shoulder. "None of that ironic sap." 

"N-O-T I-R-," Brobot began, but Jake pulled away and jumped to his feet.

"Come on, adventure awaits," he said, a little awkwardly. "And I am utterly disgusting right now, so we better hurry." 

The robot was silent behind him in the soft grass, but Jake just pressed his feelings down, letting the slosh about in the vague area of his intestines and didn't turn around. He was certain Brobot would follow.


End file.
